Undoubtedly one of the worst NCAA weekends in the history of NCAA weekends as far as Cro in concerned. I have to be honest here; the kid has picked them well this year. Believe me guys, it pains me to admit that. He pointed out that he hasn’t needed red marker since Friday. I was distraught when he mentioned this tidbit of information. I mean Tennessee escaped Butler and WKU and Davidson made the Sweet 16. I am already losing focus trying to write this update, that’s how upset I am.
But as I gather my thoughts and take a collective breath, we must realize one thing. As follower He-Man Cro Haters, we MUST stick together. If I had to peg Cro as one Little Rascal, he would be Alfalfa. He always seems to know what he talking about. Granted, he doesn’t spin the meanest game, but he is consistent in his ways. I mean, in no way do you want to be him because of the hardships he faces (25 people opposing him), but he handles the pressure in his own way that you have to respect. In the classic 1994 film, Alfalfa wins the Soap Box Derby by the length of his cow-lick. This is where things are different. I believe if we rally as a group, we can prevent this so called “Cro Magnon Man” from winning the title for a 5th year in a row.
Do you guys remember the DARE classes we had in grade school? One of the defenses to someone asking to you do drugs was strength in numbers. This principle could not be truer at this moment. While seeing Cro in the lead at this moment may induce use of drugs, it is important to realize that if we stick together, we will overcome.
This is a common theme through every ABC invitational. Cro is in the select few at the top after the first weekend. Everyone is upset. Then come the second weekend, his picks fall apart. We have no reason to fear. A wise man once said, “The only thing to fear is fear itself.” Cro will be stopped. I will not rest until it so.
Also, I believe it was another wise man who said “Ask not what the ABC Invitational can do for you, but what you can do for the ABC Invitational.” And if I am not mistaken, in the early 1900's, third wise man said "Speak softly, and kick Cro's ass in the ABC."
It is people like Boy Pierce, while I commend the ballsy picks, who have let down the ABC cause. He was without a doubt hit the hardest over the Saturday / Sunday periods. Poor Pierce has suffered losses of two Final Four teams in Georgetown and Marquette and now finds himself in the ranks of EEB and Fritz. It appears the better days are behind you Sir. Remember that time we beat Holy Angels in basketball and Wayne spazzed during the post game speech? Those were indeed the better days. I look forward to you being able to channel that intensity for next year, and finally be able to knock off Cro.
Speaking of EEB and Fritz, you guys have struggled from the get go. How does one pick 16 of the first 32 games wrong? You have to go against common sense to make the picks you made. After all the talkking up of Davidson you did so much last year, I could have sworn you would be on the bandwagon again this year. But for some reason, you ditched your boys at the last second, and they deservedly stabbed you in the back. Your bracket isn’t in that bad of shape yet, but it will happen in due time.
As for some other contestants, I’m left scratching my head. One name that comes to mind is Phil Imbesi. How could this happen? You packed serious heat last year, only to fall severely off pace this year. I don’t know what those clowns do out in St. Louis, but it is obvious that having the Bilikins as your only source of b-ball has had a direct effect on your picks. You need to get out of that town ASAP, or my name isn’t Jibbs featuring Jibbs. Do your chain hang low? Do it wobble to and fro? It is apparent at this juncture that your chain has lost its wobble. Sorry bout your luck.
Also, Brandon Gravett has found himself on the short end of the stick once again this year. I appreciate his effort in traveling to Newark, DE to root against Cro. We fell short in the Drake / WKU game, and I am still recovering. I really can’t rip on you too much because you bought me a Car Bomb after the San Diego win, for which I am eternally grateful.
I will leave you guys on that note. Look for a post between now and Thursday with a list of officially eliminated contestants. If you find you name on the list, it simply means you cannot take first place. You are still eligible for second or third place. Payout for this years ABC will be $200 to the winner, $50 to second place, and third place will get their $10 back.
Here are the standings following Round 2:
But as I gather my thoughts and take a collective breath, we must realize one thing. As follower He-Man Cro Haters, we MUST stick together. If I had to peg Cro as one Little Rascal, he would be Alfalfa. He always seems to know what he talking about. Granted, he doesn’t spin the meanest game, but he is consistent in his ways. I mean, in no way do you want to be him because of the hardships he faces (25 people opposing him), but he handles the pressure in his own way that you have to respect. In the classic 1994 film, Alfalfa wins the Soap Box Derby by the length of his cow-lick. This is where things are different. I believe if we rally as a group, we can prevent this so called “Cro Magnon Man” from winning the title for a 5th year in a row.
Do you guys remember the DARE classes we had in grade school? One of the defenses to someone asking to you do drugs was strength in numbers. This principle could not be truer at this moment. While seeing Cro in the lead at this moment may induce use of drugs, it is important to realize that if we stick together, we will overcome.
This is a common theme through every ABC invitational. Cro is in the select few at the top after the first weekend. Everyone is upset. Then come the second weekend, his picks fall apart. We have no reason to fear. A wise man once said, “The only thing to fear is fear itself.” Cro will be stopped. I will not rest until it so.
Also, I believe it was another wise man who said “Ask not what the ABC Invitational can do for you, but what you can do for the ABC Invitational.” And if I am not mistaken, in the early 1900's, third wise man said "Speak softly, and kick Cro's ass in the ABC."
It is people like Boy Pierce, while I commend the ballsy picks, who have let down the ABC cause. He was without a doubt hit the hardest over the Saturday / Sunday periods. Poor Pierce has suffered losses of two Final Four teams in Georgetown and Marquette and now finds himself in the ranks of EEB and Fritz. It appears the better days are behind you Sir. Remember that time we beat Holy Angels in basketball and Wayne spazzed during the post game speech? Those were indeed the better days. I look forward to you being able to channel that intensity for next year, and finally be able to knock off Cro.
Speaking of EEB and Fritz, you guys have struggled from the get go. How does one pick 16 of the first 32 games wrong? You have to go against common sense to make the picks you made. After all the talkking up of Davidson you did so much last year, I could have sworn you would be on the bandwagon again this year. But for some reason, you ditched your boys at the last second, and they deservedly stabbed you in the back. Your bracket isn’t in that bad of shape yet, but it will happen in due time.
As for some other contestants, I’m left scratching my head. One name that comes to mind is Phil Imbesi. How could this happen? You packed serious heat last year, only to fall severely off pace this year. I don’t know what those clowns do out in St. Louis, but it is obvious that having the Bilikins as your only source of b-ball has had a direct effect on your picks. You need to get out of that town ASAP, or my name isn’t Jibbs featuring Jibbs. Do your chain hang low? Do it wobble to and fro? It is apparent at this juncture that your chain has lost its wobble. Sorry bout your luck.
Also, Brandon Gravett has found himself on the short end of the stick once again this year. I appreciate his effort in traveling to Newark, DE to root against Cro. We fell short in the Drake / WKU game, and I am still recovering. I really can’t rip on you too much because you bought me a Car Bomb after the San Diego win, for which I am eternally grateful.
I will leave you guys on that note. Look for a post between now and Thursday with a list of officially eliminated contestants. If you find you name on the list, it simply means you cannot take first place. You are still eligible for second or third place. Payout for this years ABC will be $200 to the winner, $50 to second place, and third place will get their $10 back.
Here are the standings following Round 2:
CRO 52
Pat Shields 48
Chris Fusco 47
BIG MIKE 46
Jenna Lawall 46
Amanda Short 46
Matt Atallian 46
Ryan Fontana 44
Nico Tennant 43
Tom Moffa 43
Sports Illustrated 43
D-Weeze 41
Ken Zuroick 41
A.C Billz IV 40
Derek Fuhrmann 40
Mike Smith 39
Brandon Gravett 39
The Dennis 38
Chris Woody 38
Adam Tatz 38
Justin Romano 37
Phil Imbesi 37
Fritz Abalo 36
Michelle Folkerts 36
Boy Pierce 35
EEB SON 34
King Chaz 32
5 comments:
Damn what a shit ass drop for me...
I want Kevin Love's trailer trash 340-pound chinstrap ass out of the tournament immediately. That is all for now.
One night a man named Cro walked into Grotto's pizza on Main Street. Cro had to take a piss.
There was a line of four frat boys waiting to get into the bathroom. Cro contemplated a little joke, which he thought was totally original and spectacular. Cro shouted, "A line?! What is this, the girl's bathroom??"
Needless to say, the frat boys immediately embraced Cro, both physically and emotionally, laughing and patting him on his bottom.
The frat boys let Cro skip to the front of the line, showing their appreciation for his joke.
Cro had a wonderful piss. He read the UD Men's Lacrosse article that was posted on the wall in front of the urinal.
Cro went on his way and proceeded to accomplish the following: Got laid at the towers, won four games of beer pong, watched an episode of Ninja Warrior, and beat Eric Brooking in a 100 meter sprint. It was a hell of a night for the Cro-ster.
anonymous poster please tell me who u r, email me (adam@adamtatz.com) i will not reveal your identity to cro, i just want to shake your hand.
lol, holy shit anonymous
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